Category: Hockey Humor

Hilarious Hockey Joke (The seat is empty)

It’s Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice.

He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty.

He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there.

“No,” says the neighbor. “The seat is empty.”

“This is incredible”, said the man. “Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the final game of the Stanley Cup playoffs and not use it?”

The neighbor says “Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley Cup we haven’t been together at since we got married in 1967.”

“Oh … I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible. But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?”

The man shakes his head “No. They’re all at the funeral.”

Originally Posted by littleHossa

I am going to take a chance that this one isn’t too risque…

A woman goes into a tatoo parlor and she is a huge hockey fan. She tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of Wayne Gretzky on her inner thigh.

The guy figures it is a bit weird, but goes ahead and does the work. After about an hour he is finished and passes the woman a mirror. She looks down at the mirror and says with disgust….”That doesn’t look a thing like Wayne Gretzky. Do it again on the other side, and this time get it right.”

The guy is a little frustrated but gets back to work and does the job again, and in an hour and a half wipes his brow and hands the lady the mirror. “I am sure you will be pleased this time.”

The lady looks down at the mirror and says “I can’t believe it. What a terrible job. That again looks nothing like the Great One, you’re pathetic.”

The guy is flabbergasted. He grabs the woman by the arm and drags her out front of the store and stops the first man he sees. He points to the tattoos and says….

“NOW WHO’S THAT???!!!”

The man says…”I don’t know who the two wingers are but the centre sure looks like Lanny McDonald.”

Originally Posted by George Bachul

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